Many Good beginings left incomplete

Life is so miserable sometimes..Nothing works out your way..By writing this...I just ask myself , Have you ever tried continued to do what you had started ..atleast the one which you had started with so much of enthusiasm.. The answers is no..sometime you dream big that, you will do this and that ...at the end you be a smoky joker laughing at yourself...I had doing nothing after I started few things and even I will feel painful to move my ass....I know something is happening to me..But I Could not stop that .. I do not know where this will lead to ..Hoping My sub conscious mind will take care of everything ...I am trustful about that ,since more times I have felt subconscious drives good ..I have this experience felt when my sub conscious drives my Bike good where the external one is thinking something..It stops at signal when it is red, it is slows on speed breakers..it switch on indicators when it has to ..May be this looks foolish..the truth is subconscious is one which always drives you...
I am not writing this blog to tell everyone that i am ful of S*** ..This is to track me that I went through this phase of my life successfully...

Why the hell ..Human prefer Short Pleasures sacrificing the Long peaceful pleasures for it..Why does Man do something wrong that he knows that he is doing wrong ... succumbing to the situations and time..What will be best possible motivation for a person who dont have a dependency , who dont have desire on money ,property ..? what is it will keep him going ? The questions are more on my sides but there are no answers to it..That how life moves on..

I still dont know the purpose of my life..the personal calling as Alchemist says..when will I find it ?

I am not what Am I...I know this and I feel this..Why the Hell is this happening to me?
When will be the freedom for me? Where do I belong ? The only thing that makes me Happy is football..Even that sometimes makes me worst when I dont play well..Why is it.. there is pain eitherway..even doing what you like or even not doing what you want to..?

I don't have fear for life ... I don't have fear for Death ...But then I dont have a Hope...
What is it with No fear and No Hope ...Is the life worth with this..
What is it I should do ..to instill Hope to me keeping the 'NO fear' also with me...

Sooner or Later I will change and will write a Blog with a successful event .. Thus I am instilling the Hope on me..

I want to change myself ..so I left myself to change me not to see any movies which i do as regular activity..even I did the change but then I dont feel I am doing some useful things given those time..That change have not given useful change for me..Once in every week I go to pub for some music and booze with my friend , i stopped it for a change for atleast two months..this time i found a change ..I started hating beer ...what does it gives a change..nothing.. Rock music with Beer makes you dance ..rock music with some cocktail juices makes you to close your ears with both hands..

Peoples who read this will for sure think, WTF this idiot is upto..sometime Life gives you more to Learn when you accept you are an idiot ...Yes i am an idiot now..All my actions at the moment are idiotic..But time will change..so do me..

I will araise as the time evolves..

Life taking a new form

It is been a long time that I had scribbled online on e-space. However I do always think on what to do in my life. I have always wondered what life is..Is it a gradual death ..Is it growing old leaving your trace of genes or could say helping the ancestor genes to sustain in this world in form of increasing population ..creating a economy and laying the foundation for the successor..In all this I believe..what have you done to justify your birth in the world. ...If you can help 500 families that would serve the purpose of life. .. Even other than that..what is it more in life?????...
Recently i had undergone much of thinking and trying to understand the events that had happened and happening in my life .Life is how happy you keep yourself at the least during overwhelming problems surrounding you that you dont even excepted.To the maximum how happy you keep your trustees as well.My mind is going through lots of thinking and transformation...Exploring the nature is one..I love to trekk and have never noticed my interest on this ...The current challenges and problems have made me to notice this..At the moment i have a desire to reach MtEverest as well...Still dont know how it is going to start and how it is going to proceed further.. Hopefully i believe would altelast do the basecamp of Mteverest ....Only Time can reveal this...

The window of my thoughts

I am scribbling my thoughts for the first time in my life over a written space either be on a hard paper or e-paper . I always thought of writing my own blog after getting inspired by my friends blogs . Was so perplexed either to start with review of the movie which i watch at least one per day or to write about my black pages of my life which will certainly raise so much of controversies .
Finally I decided to post my thoughts for others to see and respond. Hoping to get a constructive criticism .If not at least this would be a vent for my unanswered thoughts.
I have noticed many times just visualizing the problems and holding it in the mind makes it harder to solve . if you put it down over some space gets you nearer to a solution. This is like calculating a math problem in mind which makes the problem harder to answer . Soon you near to the solution when you actually put down on the papers trying to solve it.
I believe and start my scribblings which will infact get me near to what should i be doing or what is correct for me.
Every one will have all the good and bad thoughts occupied or raising in their mind, however the difference between good and ugly arrives on what and how the thoughts are expressed out . Other wise every thoughts within every one mind is the cumulative of good and the ugly.
This is my first step towards the dissecting my mind over e-space.